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Coaches, Ask The Right Questions!

Coaches, Ask The Right Questions!

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A recent 1-1 conversations with a two coaches I was referred to seeded this article. I was looking for coaching in a specific topic for myself and possible faculty member for a project I’m working on.  Both coaches started the conversation with “if I learned XYZ to reach my dream goals, I could buy/attract a high end sports car (and other stuff).” I laughed. These coaches immediately lost credibility with me. How do they know I don’t already have a high end sports car? How do they know that I even care about such things? They never asked the simple questions, “What are the dreams and goals that will make you feel fulfilled?” or “What is important to you and how will learning what I offer help you attract them?” or “What do you want to attract that you don’t have now such as a house, car, etc?”

You see, the car of my dreams is sitting in my driveway, one that is amazingly comfortable, makes me happy, cares for my family, carries all of my business equipment when participating in an expo or speaking on the east coast, plush and has all I want in a car – a 2009 Honda Odyssey that I call my “Godyssey.”  One coach sounded as if they were gasping for air when the words left my mouth describing my dream car. (The impression and my judgement of their reaction was “God forbid – a mini-van? How uncouth!”) How could I not want a gorgeous sports car? And for just a millisecond, this coach took me to a place of  feeling “less than,” crazy, and into a poverty mentality for loving my car.

Yes,  when my hands are on the wheel I am one happy camper!  The folks who sit in the back captain chairs marvel at the comfort as they sit back and watch a movie or listen to music if they wish. I have driven 8 big college aged football players and their luggage to the airport in that comfortable ride and I looked like the old woman in the shoe as one after another exited my “Godyssey.” My elderly parents love riding in my chariot.  The story of how this car came into my life and found me is classic Law of Attraction and “listening to your intuition” magic. You can read about it here… it’s quite fun!

Judging without having all of the facts is a dangerous thing to do, Coaches.  Perhaps the gasp meant they realized they messed up, or their judgment got in the way, or they may have realized I’m not their ideal client. Who knows.  Perhaps one day I may buy what these coaches consider to be a luxury car but honestly, such things don’t really matter to me.

You see, these coaches have no idea of who I am and what my dreams are because they didn’t ask the right questions! And when I commented on the question they asked, they didn’t like the answer because it wasn’t what they wanted to hear. They don’t know that I have already attracted amazing physical things such as my ideal house, cars, perfect outfits for events, my clients, my four publishers and more. They don’t know that I attracted my amazing health after decades of being ill, my 3 kids and a wonderful career of guiding Intuitive Leaders to flow with passion, integrity, intuition and authenticity to realize their own dreams. They don’t know that I listen deeply to my intuition and live my mantra of:

“Don’t Tell Me “NO!” Tell me “YES!” And Let’s Awaken The Possibilities And Find Solutions Together.”

After all, I’m an Intuitive Leader and a Magnetic Business Attraction Queen and am very good at guiding leaders to do the same for themselves and their teams. The integration of practical systems with intuition and Law of Attraction principles nurtures others and creates powerhouse leadership and outcomes.

My priorities as an executive and business coach are different from these coaches I was interviewing to guide me in learning a specific skillset where I could use help. I’m not in the business of impressing others with “stuff.” I’m in the business of asking the hard questions and guiding leaders to be the best that THEY can be to bring out the best in those whose lives they touch. I want a coach who is a good or better than I am in bringing out my best. Clearly, these folks missed the mark.

If these coaches had asked the right questions they would have learned the following: the money I would spend on a super duper sports car would go towards supporting my philanthropic projects, enhancing my home and taking my family on vacations….things that truly create memories.

Cars? I have my dream car thank you very much.

Terry Wildemann

#Honda  #Leadership  #IntuitiveLeadership  #MagneticBusinessAttractin

  • Stephanie LH Calahan
    Posted at 19:03h, 27 June Reply

    Absolutely Terry! I feel the same. Coaches that talk yachts, cars and bling don’t get the life I want to lead. All those things are totally fine, but they are not me. It also sounds like they did a poor job of asking you questions before you ever hopped on the phone with them. I have an intake form that I ask my prospective clients to fill out. By reading their responses, I have a feel for what they want to do as well as what motivates them. Then, when we talk, I can confirm those assumptions and go deeper.

    • admin
      Posted at 16:17h, 29 June Reply

      Thanks for your feedback, Stephanie!

  • Mo Bailey
    Posted at 22:45h, 27 June Reply

    SO true, so true. Great article, Terry! I enjoyed reading it from both similar experience as a coachee, and as a coach who had my own learning curve, yet with gratitude, have reached a point where no sales pitches are necessary when the fit is right – and those are the clients who receive the best from me organically, and who I receive the greatest joy in my career with too. 🙂 You lady. This article. Right on target!

    • admin
      Posted at 16:18h, 29 June Reply

      Thanks, Mo. When we truly connect with out clients all the right seem to flow from our mouths. It becomes easy.

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